Jul 10 (edited) in Time/Calendar Management
3 things to do if people don't show up to your meetings
We were sitting in silence for the past 5 minutes. Our colleague did not yet join our call. We were depending on them to give us the OK for an important initiative we were working on for the past 4 months. It took a lot of work, courage, and patience. And here we were... nothing.
Not sure if this has ever happened to you, but it sure is not fun! It's wasting time, energy, and also plummets the morale of everyone.
In this article you'll find practical tools to:
- Don't get upset
- Clarify your objectives and create a common goal
- Make it easy for people to show up/reschedule
Let's dig in!
- Check yourself before you wreck yourself! 馃馃馃馃槅馃槅馃槅
Getting angry is never the answer unless... the question is: What is never the answer?
So, check your emotional state: Are you angry? Are you frustrated? Do you feel disappointed? Do you feel let down?
Start by writing down how you feel (on a piece of paper, or any writing software - Notepad, OneNote, Word, etc.). Spend 5-10 min writing everything that crosses your mind. Get into the flow of it.
It's a bit of a cathartic exercise.
It will get any negative emotion off your chest and you can start going into step 2.
Understand that:
- No one owes you anything.
- People are not actively thinking of you (a few exceptions aside). They may be busy, lazy, or maybe even uncaring. At the end of the day: It does not matter. It's their burden. Let them carry it. Don't judge. You don't know what they're going through.
- Someone can hurt you by putting your request at the bottom of their To-Do list. Even unintentionally.
Being fuzzy, unspecific, and wanting to punish the other person will not score you any points. Even though they may be wrong, no one likes to be put under the microscope. You don't either. So move on.
Solution: Get on top of their mind and their To-Do list.
2. When your purpose is clear, success is very near. 馃樁鈥嶐煂笍馃樁鈥嶐煂笍馃樁鈥嶐煂笍
Ask yourself the following questions:
- What's in it for me? What am I getting out of this? What do I selfishly want?
- What's in it for them? What are they getting out of this? What do they selfishly want?
- What do I want for the relationship?
In order to come up with good answers for the second round of questions, put yourself in the other's shoes. Empathize with them. Think about their problems and wishes. What are they struggling with? What do they want?
These should give you a good understanding of your perspective and their perspective and the way to move forward.
For example:
- I want to get the approval from our colleague, so that I can pitch it forward.
- My colleague wants to make a business impact which will make them feel that they have achieved great results. They also want to improve their reputation in the organization.
- I want us to collaborate well and make an impact together using this initiative as a first step.
3. Soften the way, brighten the day! 馃尀馃尀馃尀
If you want people to do something, remove the friction and make it easy for them.
If you don't want people to do something, increase friction and make it hard.
In a shorter form: Be helpful. Help them remember.
Ask yourself the following:
a. What do I need to do before the call to make sure they remember?
Some practical tips:
- Send a message one day before
- Send a message 15 min before the call
b. What should I do during the call to make sure they still show up even though they are late?
- Wait 5 minutes for them to show up
- If they don't show up ask them if they are able to join or if they want to reschedule
Communication hack:
Make it easy for them to give you an answer. Don't write essays. Move things forward.
Instead of:
Hey. We have a meeting scheduled right now. I was wondering if you are able to join or if you've forgot about it. I'm sure you haven't forgotten, but I just wanted to remind you about it. Anyway, I'm in the call so anytime you want to join, feel free.
Do this:
Hey. Are you able to join our call?
- [Positive answer]
Perfect! See you in a bit!
Hey. Are you able to join our call?
- [Negative answer]
Ok. No problem. [Choose one of the 2 variants]
Variant 1: If it's ok with you, I'll look into your calendar and reschedule.
Variant 2: I can do Mon 11 am, Tue 2 pm or Wed 3pm. Which timeframe fits your best?
c. What should I do after the call if they did not show up and did not answer my message during our call?
Follow up in a concise manner:
Hey. Let's reschedule our call. What timeslot fits you best? I'm free Mon 11 am, Tue 2pm, Wed 3pm. Thanks!
Don't do:
Hey! I was in the call for 15 min, but I guess you forgot or smth may have come up. I'd still love to have a chat with you. I hope you also would like to meet up. Waiting for your time proposals, if you think we should reschedule. Have an excellent day ahead!
In summary. The 3 things you need to do to increase other people's accountability in showing up for calls are:
- Don't get upset
- Clarify your objectives and create a common goal
- Make it easy for people to show up/reschedule
You won't be able to make anyone show up, but you definitely can make sure you stay top of their mind. Best of luck!
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3 things to do if people don't show up to your meetings
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