Needing Some Support From My Brothers

Hey guys! So I’m currently in a situation that I really don’t want to be in but I feel stuck and I’m not sure what exactly to do to get out of it. I’ve been feeling stagnant and like I need to break free from the chains of my old self. I’m not one to usually ask for help but I’m looking to break that pattern and one of the reasons why I joined this group was to get support from like-minded brothers.

So the situation is that I work at a farm and retreat center in Fallbrook, CA helping to manage their hipcamp and camp store as well as various events held onsite. I don’t really like the job nor do I feel passionate about it at all. I also don’t really vibe with the people who I work with. A couple of them are friends who I have known for awhile but they don’t really have the same aspirations as me and I don’t resonate with them anymore to be completely honest.

I just feel like we are on different trajectories and being connected with them at least closely is not helping me at all.One is constantly needing/using various drugs which is not an energy I like being involved with and the other is a bit negative and not that supportive or high vibe. I’m trying to figure out a solution so I can do what I really love to do- which is namely music, film and personal development stuff- and I can make enough money to sustain myself and live life on my own terms. I’m really looking to connect with people who are on the same path as me so we can help and support each other along the way.

I feel like I’ve had a pattern of not being able to be totally self-reliant and self-sufficient and when I work with people the relationships often become dysfunctional and co-dependent. I am really looking to break free from this pattern and I figured this group would be a great place to ask for some help/guidance with this. I’d like to develop relationships that are mutually beneficial, win-win and interdependent. Thanks brothers and I look forward to connecting more!!! 🙏

Some additional details I thought to add- the position I’m in is mainly work trade and so I’m not currently making enough money to rent a place to stay elsewhere outside of the property. The work trade requirements are just 10 hours per week. I am however allowed to host my own events/workshops here and I can keep 90% of the profits so in that regard it is a pretty good set up. The property is also really beautiful but it’s mainly the lack of freedom that causes me a lot of stress and the inability to acquire sufficient financial resources so that I can live life on my own terms and not be overly dependent on others.

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