Has anyone experienced sex with a Narc? For the record, I'm divorcing my narc wife. Didn't realize what i got myself into until diving deep into narc abuse and watching several of @Paul Benjamin 's videos. here's what I experienced: No eye contact, mostly doggy, enjoyment of sex in public places (or with windows open so people could see), and her inability to orgasm unless I put my knee between her legs. In other words: I was an object she would masturbate to. Afterwards, there was little to no cuddling. Half the time she would jump on her phone/instagram after the act. I figured at the time this is just how she got off. But looking back, I see how highly dysfunctional this was in comparison to my other relationships. over time, the sex diminished and I was told "I had to warm her up first" before wanting sex. I was also accused of only wanting her for sex and shamed for wanting it. Yea, I know, it's weird, but I'm sharing this so others don't fall into the trap.

I'm posting this because an interesting question was brought up in another thread. It's a question that some of us men often ask, and that is "should I want more"? This is in reference to the goal of optimized happiness in an LTR. I covered in a previous post that some requirements a woman has for choosing a mate isn't actually them choosing based on "the best" or most optimized of a quality but on meeting a minimal requirement. So for example, height. Women might say "I want a guy who is six feet tall" but really most will fuck a guy (and relationship a guy) who is not 6 feet. It's really a minimal height that they are looking for. And she could be with a man who is 5'7" and that man can be "her best". Really it's a minimal standard that she needs. What makes them hypergamous is that there are 5 needs that they MUST maximize for a guy to be perceived as her Apex Alpha; those being meeting her Sexual, emotional, security, paternity, and legacy needs. A guy can be a greek god who checks all the blocks; but she will perceive the 5'7" man who gives her peak feelings in those 5 categories as "her best" mate option. You can read the other thread for more explanation on that with women. But what about guys? What can we look at to predict if a man is making the "right choice" for maximum happiness in an LTR? First off, men ARE NOT hypergamous. Men ARE NOT hypergamous. Meaning you, with the dick and balls..... YOU ARE NOT HYPERGAMOUS! lol, had to say that because I run into it with new guys to my stuff... they have heard the word and they think guys must be the same as women because of equality and gynocentrism and all that jazz. Nope lol. Men are different. Now, are some men "never satisfied" and always looking for more no matter what they have? Yes. But usually that is an inner game problem (I see this as a problem) that needs to be corrected. Most men aren't always striving for more in new women never to be satisfied ever when it comes to an LTR, provided that the woman checks his boxes (I will get into that later). And thank fucking God lol. What a nightmare that would be.

Hi gents, anyone here living in Miami? I'm looking to meet up and trade notes.

So a common marketing tactic nowadays in digital marketing is to drop in a DM and then solicit for a "mentorship program" when it comes to getting girls. I'm actually all for guys marketing APPROPRIATELY provided they have a good product or service. Here is the difference though. Guys who probably DON'T have a good product, service, or coaching method will drop in your dm's, have a few general questions (that they can easily send to a large amount of people or have a bot do it) to rope you in , and then immediately go for the pitch that will sound something like "we are a lot alike and our goals are aligned. can I talk to you about a mentorship program blah blah." And they wiil do it in private communities like this one without having any conversation with the moderators or owners of the community. Guys who could have something to offer will offer value up front for free. I do this through youtube, posts on here, newsletters, free webinars or live calls, etc. I do this because I have a lot of value to offer and there is a lot more behind a paywall, and I want a person to know what they can expect to get out of what they are paying and to have proof of results through the value I offer up front. This is a more objective measure then testimonials in my opinion, not to say that testimonials aren't valuable. Also, guys who offer value have no problems telling you what they do to market themselves. I have no secrets when it comes to marketing because the value comes from my work, not from using marketing tactics to "trick" people into buying shit. For me it's very simple. I want myself or someone on my team to have as many real conversations with real human beings as I can, offer value up front, and then let the person decide if they want to pay for the results that they can have confidence that they will get. And coaches/therapists/mentors who have value to offer wouldn't go into another guys business (like their private community) and try to solicit their members in their dm's without having the respect of getting permission. That person isn't treating the owner of that community as a human being, and therefore demonstrates that he is a "taker" who sees his client relationships as transactional ones (atm machines) rather then as a relationship where he helps another human beings.

Does anyone have experiences or advice about a suspected covert narcissistic woman, particularly in the love bombing phase? How to tell if it’s genuine desire or love bombing? Is there anything I can do or say to get a better understanding and read this person? Thanks in advance