Urgent: need YOUR review on this funnel copy · Selling Online / Prime Mover

Urgent: need YOUR review on this funnel copy

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uvZKAEL1A5SI_UyUG-xUznO5mzu_rOej_jtIkGJT1Ng/edit

This is a sales page I wrote for one of my clients, and I really need your feedback.

(Especially on the story... I don't know if the sales page is clear and the story compelling enough to make the reader buy...)

I wonder if I'm talking too much about Bart and not about the reader... Can y'all give some general and specific feedback about the headlines, leads, and story? It's my first big project for my client, and I genuinely want to bring him results (I work on a commission-based deal ;))

I still have to run some parts through GPT though...

The sales page is translated from Dutch, so beware of potential mistakes

Thanks in advance.

Love,

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