I've been procrastinating Hypnosis for a while, but I have still been putting effort into learning about myself, and it's not necessarily bad that I procrastinated, cause during the session things came up that I don't think I would've handled well if I hadn't have experienced some of the things I have lately. For example, I have been doing some Shadow Work with a coach in my country (Denmark). Shadow work is very similar to Hypnosis but you do shorter sessions of about 10-minutes and try to "integrate" certain shadows. During these sessions, I learned that my imagination/subconscious can run wild. It can throw curveballs that seem random. For example, for those of you who've listened to the self-hypnosis audio, you know that there isn't "Supposed" to be a "Good Part of You" that appears and talks to you. For me this happened. I was struggling with the Tornado...It wouldn't disappear after it came and sucked everything out of me. Then this creature...a small cartoon-looking half-man half-scorpion popped up. Almost looked like a cartoon beetled with claws like a scorpion. It told me "Listen, I am the good part of you. The part that wants the best for you" and then it helped me stop focusing on the tornado. And when I released the grime from my body, it flowed out FAST and created a GIANT pile of shit. A mountain. And I got propelled upwards and slid down it at the end. Then when the dirt dissapeared into the ground, it created a big crater which I fell into, and the ground closed in above me. But then I got shot up through the hole and it disappeared as I flew out. And what taught me to just let it happen was a mushroom trip I had about a month ago. And I was tought how to deal with these unexpected things through the shadow work. I learned to talk to these enteties and that being forceful doesn't work. Anyways. The belief I worked on was the belief that I cannot change. I felt incapable of being able to change through hypnosis for example. I always felt tethered to my old self, like I was being delusional about the change I'd already made and that any future positive change was too good to be true.

I decided to make some big life changes today and cut out a couple things I've been hanging onto that really aren't working. I see this as a good sign! I just want to put it down somewhere to cement it in my mind that these shifts are happening... My first big goal that I can remember since joining the self-development community was quitting porn. Unfortunately I have only had limited success. I got really deep into the nofap community, posting on the forums there daily for years (they are big on daily journal entries). I decided to delete my account there today because it obviously isn't helping and I think that community keeps far more people stuck than it saves. The need to get a perfect streak in order to move on to "X" thing, and once they hit their target they almost always relapse shortly afterwards or before and end up right back in that pit. Obviously this is self sabotage and I have done it myself a number of times. It also plays into my toxic need to do things "perfectly" and takes me out of actually living and pursuing what I want. I also left my volunteer position working with a local non-profit that works with the mental health community locally here because the vibe is way off. If anything even slightly offends, overwhelms or makes anyone feel unsafe it isn't aloud, but the problem is that everything triggers somebody so you increasingly can't act naturally and I need to get in touch with my authentic self and learn to act boldly. Another problem with this place is that some of the girls that work there just want to use me for attention because I am the only attractive guy there, but they have boyfriends and stuff so whatever... I need to stop getting sucked into these types of dynamics.

Hi guys, I haven't posted on here for a while, but I feel like I've got something quite relevant and positive to share. So I have recently started to learn hypnotherapy and am currently in my second month. The course takes place over a weekend every month in person, and then we are given work to complete till the next weekend we meet. After completing Ryans course I already had a bit of a head start, and it's a nice small and extremely positive group of people. I write this as an update but more of a recognition of some of the BS in our conscious minds. Because not that long ago the conscious thought in my head was "I probably can't learn this" Or "I don't think I am ready yet" it was all garbage! There is and was never any reason I couldn't, in fact doing two years of therapy training and all the things I've learnt from Ryan made a perfect starting point and a massive head start if anything. But the lingering voice still... well lingers, haha XD. So if you have some similar voice or internal thought, then I think sometimes the best thing to do is to jump in and move towards what you want. Hope you are all well, :D Stay Strong!

Hi all, today we're discussing how do we know what's coming from our subconscious, and what isn't? I have a couple good video clips from Harvard trained psychiatrist Dr. K (HealthyGamerGG on YouTube) and "Shark Tank" venture capitalist Kevin O'Leary that you won't want to miss. See you soon.